I got my first bicycle when I was about 8 or 9 years old.
And learning how to ride it for the very first time – that moment where you are one with space and time – with no support from a sibling or parent – you are riding a bike – gliding along with complete freedom.
It is one of those truly innocent aha moments in life.
It is, next to the first few steps as a toddler, one of those steps in the cycle of life where you are slowly but surely moving from the nest…
into the real World.
My first bike was a Raleigh – at the time an English made set of wheels – a coaster bike – a little too large for me and ever so gently second hand. But I loved it.
And in one small stroke, one giant leap of faith, my World went from our immediate surroundings to a limitless vista of potentially kilometers of cycling in every direction.
One of the first accessories on my single speed bike were flappers. Ostensibly pieces of paper held in place by clothes pins that made a rat-a-snap sound as they slapped the spokes on the front and rear tires. Pretty amusing stuff for a 9 year old kid and again it represented, in small part, that inevitable step toward the ultimate freedom of having a set of wheels with an internal combustion engine attached.
By the time I was 10 years old, I had realized that these pieces of hard paper were slowing me down.
Fast forward some 4 decades and I found myself reading the London Drug flyer – a local Target style super-store and came across this in-car gadget… a thing that you plug into your cigarette lighter that sends an FM signal to your car stereo…
Your car stereo that you turn right up and roll down the windows… so you car can sound like a muscle car.
Picture above: The SoundRacer V8 Transmitter – Converts your modern, boring vehicle into a heart pounding 60’s muscle car…
Say it with me folks. F*ck me.
So. In effect… it is a noise pollution device… I am imaging that it was designed precisely for men in their 20’s to 50’s who never grew out of the phase that I did when I was 10.
Men that need to make noise with this stupid device
I have to tell you folks. This is simply the most ridiculous things I have seen in a long, long time – and I have seen a lot. Makes you wonder. What the heck is next?
Anyway. Piece of advice for some of you testosterone challenged dweebs in K-cars that need to draw attention to your pathetic selves… by blasting your stereo in my hood…
Grow up.