Roll up the rim to win in Afghanistan

It is said that you cannot fully appreciate a great cup of coffee if you have never had one – or have been relegated to drinking super-store pre-ground and tinned brown vermiculite… like Folgers.

The same can be said for a great doughnut – and I will wager dollars for, well, you know… that if you have ever had one, you would remember it.

Kind of like your first kiss. When it’s good, it’s really good… and you never forget.

A few years back, Krispy Kreme arrived on our shores – if only briefly. It seemed likely that they would make inroads north of 49… but they didn’t. Thanks to the likes of Tim Horton’s.

And this is not to say that Krispy Kreme is great – because they are not. They are fresh – and like coffee, fresh is very important… whether it’s a cup of joe or a deep fried doughy nugget.

For Canadians, Tim Horton’s is as much a part of our consciousness as hockey, maple syrup, fresh air and wide open spaces.
Except Tim’s is not as good as it once was – and to deny this is an act of unbridled, unpatriotic and truly Un-Canadian self deception.
There was a time when the doughnuts were prepared fresh from fresh ingredients… and darn it, it makes a difference. And yes, I know they make up their sandwiches fresh from fresh ingredients… not sure about the quality of their breads – but that is nitpicking.

And in the last couple of years, they have taken this unholy artifice to battle weary Afghanistan. My god. Tim’s in Afghanistan. This is what Canada’s international role has been reduced to – clogging the arteries of our soldiers no less… and our allies.

Wouldn’t it make more sense to give these puck sized weapons away to the Taliban?
I know. Bad idea. They would hate us even more than they do now.
A few facts about Tim’s outcropping in Khandahar:

The doughs, icings and cremes used in this abbreviated menu of cookies, bagels and 12 kinds of doughnuts, as well as the coffees served in Afghanistan were deployed about 45 days earlier from a plant in Kingston, Ontario – The same depot that also supplies Tim’s franchises across Ontario and Canada.

They also exported the favored Canuck sport of rim-rolling to the dusty plains of Afghanistan. Except the prizes are slightly different…

They include camouflage Tim Horton’s ball caps, GPS global positioning devices and five grand prizes of $1,000.

What, no boots, bullets or sun-block?

As much as I support what Canadians do best:
Exporting peace, good will and maple syrup… and yes, putting on a uniform, climbing on a transport and flying to a hostile place half a World away and getting behind the cause of democracy – do our enlisted men and women not deserve better?

A quick scan through Google reveals that Tim Horton’s cuisine was the most anticipated perk to arrive in advance of best wishes from loved ones at home… so perhaps I am the one off the mark.